Got off a few zingers tonight………..

“Waiter is the tiramisu any good?”

“Why sir it’s one of our most popular desserts.”

“It didn’t ask if it was popular I asked if it was good.”

“Well sir if it wasn’t good it wouldn’t be popular.”


What a shithead


I am walking down the aisle and a man snaps his fingers to get my attention. This is a major faux pas with us waiters. I ignore him.

When I pass by a second time the man snaps his fingers again. I stop, look at the floor, do a 360 degree spin, then look under his table. His wife has nice legs.

“Waiter what are you doing?”

“Why I’m looking for your dog sir. Is he lost?”


Otherwise a very nice evening, I waited on William Hurt. He was gracious, well mannered, and tipped well. He didn’t snap his fingers. Introduced himself as “William.” Very cool. Girlfriend a complete babe.

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