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Its only a flesh wound!

It’s Friday night and I’m waiting on some real assholes. Two middle aged couples, so busy bad mouthing absent friends, I wonder what they say about one another in private. So animated is this little hate fest that I’m shooed away every time I approach

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The Waiter & the Spoon

A friend emailed me this. I just had to post it here! A timeless lesson on how consultants can make a difference for an organization… Last week, we took some friends out to a new restaurant, and noticed that the waiter who took our order

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Whatever………

Ok, some waiters are pigs……… Waiter has sex with underage girl – Story here. …….and some of us need anger management classes. Waiter accused of vandalizing home Man those waiters at Sizzler are mean bastards.

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Some Like It Hot

“Waiter this coffee is cold.” “It’s a fresh pot madam.” “Whatever. Get me a hot cup of coffee.” I go back to the kitchen. I heat up a cup with water from the espresso machine and fill it with piping hot coffee. That usually does

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Crack Head Caroline

It’s a frigid Wednesday night in February and we’re preparing to close early. The temperature has never inched above five degrees. Domino’s pizza delivery might be busy but we sure as hell aren’t. Sitting around counting our meager take for the night, we hear Caroline

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Lord of the Flies?

It’s a beautiful summer’s day and two ladies are lunching al fresco on the patio. Everything is going swimmingly save for the insects that buzz around trying to catch a meal – or lay an egg. It’s a slow shift. I am inside deeply engrossed

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Thanks Ben!

Many thanks to Ben Hammersley for linking me on his excellent blog. If you have not read or seen his work – check it out. A man of singular wit, his blog should be required online reading. Thanks again Ben! I guess this means I

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Critters

This Sunday night I am walking up the aisle when I hear a commotion near the front tables. A lady is shouting unintelligibly. I soon discover why. Perching on her table is Sciurus carolinensis – an American grey squirrel. He isn’t happy. “Holy fucking shit!”

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Stupid cheating husbands

You would think that if a guy cheats on his wife he’d be smart enough not to take his mistress to a restaurant him and his spouse patronize regularly. You would be wrong of course. When guys think with their dicks the IQ points start