The Big One

Louis comes running up to me. He doesn’t look good. “I think I’m having a heart attack,” he gasps, clutching his chest. Its five-thirty on Wednesday afternoon. We have no reservations. Three waiters are scheduled to work the floor. The odds are...

Repeal Day

Seventy-three years ago today the 21st amendment to the US Constitution was fully ratified. If you forgot your history the 21st Amendment repealed the 18th Amendment. I know, don’t all jump up and down at once. But a quick Wikipedia check would tell you that’s when...

The Gym

It’s Wednesday night and I’m at the gym. I’ve been working out faithfully since the middle of summer. My cholesterol’s down, I’ve lost some weight, and my doctor’s thrilled with my blood pressure. The health benefits are nice, but...

What Else Do You Do?

When customers ask me, “What else do you do?” they’re operating from the usually correct assumption that waiters are always working on another gig; singing, writing, acting, modeling, etc. However, some of us are really waiters. This is our...