Nice Shift

Got off a few zingers tonight………..

“Waiter is the tiramisu any good?”

“Why sir it’s one of our most popular desserts.”

“It didn’t ask if it was popular I asked if it was good.”

“Well sir if it wasn’t good it wouldn’t be popular.”


What a shithead


I am walking down the aisle and a man snaps his fingers to get my attention. This is a major faux pas with us waiters. I ignore him.

When I pass by a second time the man snaps his fingers again. I stop, look at the floor, do a 360 degree spin, then look under his table. His wife has nice legs.

“Waiter what are you doing?”

“Why I’m looking for your dog sir. Is he lost?”


Otherwise a very nice evening, I waited on William Hurt. He was gracious, well mannered, and tipped well. He didn’t snap his fingers. Introduced himself as “William.” Very cool. Girlfriend a complete babe.

9 thoughts on “Nice Shift”

  1. PD says:

    Haha. I always snap back at my customers as I keep walking past them.

  2. Beth says:

    I hate when they ask if the item is good. Like I would say no, it sucks ass. Of course it’s good asshole.

  3. Ness says:

    hahaha That’s hilarious! When I worked as a waitress (in a foreign country, to make it worse, in a restaurant catering to people with absurd amounts of money and people pretending to have absurd amounts of money) I learned the snappers were internationally loathed by waitstaff. No matter which country the waiter was from, a snap was offensive. I wish I’d heard that comeback back then, it would’ve come in useful. As it was, I would stop dead in my tracks, turn to face the snapper, do a full up and down glare so they knew damn well I had heard them and walk away. No service for a good couple of minutes. Most people were pretty sheepish after.

    As for the tasting thing, I’m a vegetarian, and people would always ask if the chicken was good, or whatever else. Always an awkward moment.

  4. Josh says:


    William Hurt is a walking Academy Award of Merit.
    Did you wash his feet?

  5. Sarah says:

    Just because a food item is popular does NOT mean it’s good. People tend to order Tiramisu because it’s USUALLY good. But your restaurant could make it with strawberries and toothpaste…and then, it would suck. Tiramisu is not always good. You were too hard on the customer.

    Snappers, should get their ears flicked.


    sarah- you are one of those ppl who just loves to contradict with everything arent you?…it’s popular = its go0d…the guy felt like an ass afterwards because even he realized this logic…why can’t you?

  7. snafu says:

    Either side of the argument aside, the mental image of tiramisu made with strawberries and toothpaste is pretty funny.

    Anyway it seems hard to make bad tiramisu, but the stuff at a high end family owned Italian/Mediterranean restaurant in my town is to die for. It’s probably that way at many of the high end places (such as the one the waiter was working at).

  8. Long Retired says:

    You know what’s worse then snapping of fingers?? The hiss – I used to work on a beach bar in the islands, I think it must have been a Jamaican thing, whenever the Jamaicans were there they hissed at you to try to get you to come over. We all usually employed the same tactic as snapping (international wait staff) – look over to ensure you know that they hissed, then continue about your business.

  9. Kat says:

    I never ask if something is good, but I’ll ask what you reccomend or if I haven’t tried it before I’ll ask what it tastes like. With tiramisu for instance (which I’ve never tried) the answer is coffee which let’s me know I’ll hate it

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