Ask the Waiter – Are you a Liar?

Hi Waiter: I’ve been reading your blog for some time now as well as other waiter blogs and I do have a new appreciation. Have you ever lied to a customer? Have you ever served a customer something other than what they specifically ordered? For example – if...

Ask The Waiter

Waiter: Over the past year, my girlfriend and I have forsaken going to church in favor of the other American Sunday morning ritual—brunch. Most of the brunches in our part of the world, are buffet-style, which is generally okay with me since it allows me to eat at my...

The Great Dane

“I’m gonna kill him.” “Take a breath,” I reply. “Calm down.” “I’m gonna kill his entire family,” the big man sputters. “And after I kill him I’m gonna strangle his children and rape his mother.” The man’s words push against me like an angry wave. My stomach clenches...

Ask the Waiter – Tell Tale Signs

Waiter, I have been reading your blog for quite a while and really enjoy your stories… My question is: What are the tell-tales for a bad restaurant vs. a good one? What kinds of things signal that this may be a $100 a plate establishment but they aren’t...

Ask the Waiter – Foreigners!

Dear Waiter If someone with a foreign accent forgets to tip, do most waitstaff realize that tipping isn’t a universal practice outside the US and forgive them, or do they get angry about it? Trust me, we get angry about it. This is how we get paid. It’s your...

How to Score with a Waitress

This is the first “guest blogger” to be published on Waiter Rant. If all goes well and the submissions are good, I’ll publish one a week. Enjoy! How to Score with a Waitress – Ella Lawrence I was asked out by my last table at The Bistro last...