by waiter | Oct 11, 2010 | Uncategorized
It’s the week before my gallbladder operation and I want a few last hurrahs before my digestive system goes into hibernation. So my friend Ray I pull into a Sonic off Route 46. “I’ve never been to one of these places before,” I say. “You’ll love it,” Ray says as we...
by waiter | Oct 7, 2010 | Uncategorized
I went to the doctor the other day for my post-op follow up. Everything is good, though my blood tests showed some little things that need to be investigated. Nothing serious mind you, just an overabundance of caution on the surgeon’s part. Of course, no one likes to...
by waiter | Oct 6, 2010 | Uncategorized
It’s a crisp autumn afternoon and I’m in a car hunting for parking on the Upper West Side. Unfortunately, finding a spot in this neighborhood is like trying to find a virgin in a whorehouse. Luckily I’m not driving. I’m convalescing you know. “Is that a spot?” my...
by waiter | Oct 4, 2010 | Uncategorized
I’m leaving a hibachi place in Paramus, NJ when I see a Mercedes SUV swing into a handicapped spot. Two well-dressed parents with three equally bespoke children walk out of the car and into the restaurant. The adults are slim and in shape and none of the children have...
by waiter | Oct 1, 2010 | Uncategorized
I’m laying on an operating table thinking about death. Now I’m just getting my gallbladder taken out. It’s a same day procedure and by nightfall I’ll be home sipping low fat soup and zoned out on Percocet. Or will I? My godfather went in for a routine hip replacement...
by waiter | Aug 17, 2010 | Uncategorized
I’m at the cigar shop I patronize when a customer nicknamed Doc asks me a question. “Say I’m in a restaurant and the owner’s serving me.” Doc asks. “Do I tip him?’ “It depends,” I say. “On what?” “If no waiters are working but there’s busboys I’d still leave a tip.”...
