by waiter | Oct 19, 2005 | Uncategorized
“Man I’m having a rough week,” Celine says. “What’s happening?” I reply. “You know how I get when it rains,” she says sadly. Celine, one of our part time hostesses, has an incredible phobia about driving when it rains. Over the past year the problem has become worse....
by waiter | Oct 17, 2005 | Uncategorized
“Jesus Arlene,” I say, “You’re getting bigger by the second.” Arlene is eight and a half month pregnant. Still waiting tables, she looks like she’s about to pop. “I swear I’m bigger than I was yesterday,” she moans. “Any day now,” I say. “My due date’s November...
by waiter | Oct 16, 2005 | Uncategorized
“So whaddya got for us tonight Poppy?” I ask Ernesto, our sous chef. Ernesto unenthusiastically produces a list of the night’s specials from his back pocket. Telling me the specials is just a formality. After five years I can predict the entire lineup. “And, finally,...
by waiter | Oct 10, 2005 | Uncategorized
It’s a rainy Saturday night and the Bistro’s jammin’ We don’t have a free table until 9:30. But that doesn’t stop prospective customers angling for a seat. Angelina, out Sicilian spitfire hostess, keeps the yuppies hordes at bay with a firm hand, a lovely smile, and a...
by waiter | Oct 8, 2005 | Uncategorized
“So you gonna vote tomorrow?” Saroya asks me. “Yes,” I reply, looking over my copy of the Times. I’m reading about the riots in France. Did they run out of cheese? “Who you gonna vote for?” Saroya says. “It’s a secret ballot dear.” “C’mon,” Saroya says, “Tell me.”...
by waiter | Oct 8, 2005 | Uncategorized
The door chimes. I look up. In walks the fattest man I’ve ever seen. “Holy shit!” I whisper, “Its Mr. Creosote!” Creosote lumbers down the aisle and plants himself on a dainty chair. I feel bad for that chair. “Oh my God,” Monique whispers back, “He’s huge.” “Better...
