Monthly Archives: March 2013

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The Hero’s Song

I was surfing the internet when I found a trailer for the upcoming Superman movie, Man of Steel. When I was done watching it I realized I had tears in my eyes. As I get older, I find myself choking up more at things –

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My Trader Joe’s Phobia

Annie loves Trader Joe’s. I mean loves them. I’m surprised the company’s logo isn’t tattooed on her butt. Until I met her, however, I had never stepped inside one of their stores. I’ve experienced jihadist attachment to supermarkets before. I dated several women in Manhattan,

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There’s No Escape

Annie loves estate-sales. So, after sampling wedding cakes at a bakery in Park Ridge, we decide to harness our chocolate ganache-boosted energy levels and drive to a sale on the other side of town. Park Ridge is a very affluent Jersey burg so you can’t

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Fifty-Million Dollar Pussy

Annie and I are watching a news story about billionaire George Soros on television. His 27-year-old ex-girlfriend, miffed that the financier gave a New York City apartment he allegedly promised her to another woman, is suing him for fifty million dollars. “That’s disgusting,” Annie says.

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Tu Est Petrus?

I am what could be generously called a lapsed Catholic. But even if I become an atheist Buddhist with Zoroastrian tendencies, I am and will forever be a former seminarian. Even though I was never ordained, the experience left an indelible mark on my soul